HR Ep 32 – The Power of Choice

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Listen Notes

The Fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink.  Our so-called will power becomes practically nonexistent.  We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago.  We are without defense against the first drink.

Pg. 24 of The Big Book

This tragic situation has already arrived in practically every case long before it is suspected!

Pg. 24 of The Big Book

Why are choices so important

Alcohol, this disease, it took our choices away.  You can choose to take them back.

  • You choose to stop digging.
  • You choose to check into rehab.
  • You choose to go to meetings.
  • You choose to get a sponsor.
  • You choose to work the steps.
  • You chose to continue to work the steps.
  • No one else can make this choice for you.  You have to.  That’s why it’s so hard, and at the same time that is why it works.

The tale of two meetings

  1. The first was my Friday Night Men’s Beltline, St. Louis Park, MN.
  2. The 2nd was Hosanna! Shakopee, MN.
    •   If you looking for a church I cannot recommend Hosanna! enough, I go to the one in Shakopee, but they are all great and there are 1000 other great churches out there as well.

WHy attending meetings is so powerful

I also tell you this: if two of you agree here on earth concerning anything you ask, my Father in heaven will do it for you.  For where two or more gather together as my followers, I am there among them.

Matthew 18: 19-20

We can look to the pandemic to show how important social interaction is.  For people with mental illness and personally I’ll say for alcoholics the pandemic was a huge tipping point.

What did I learn at these two meetings?

Friday Beltline:

Opening reading – 6th step – were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character

If we can answer to our satisfaction, we then look at Step Six.  We have emphasized willingness as being indispensable.  Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable?  Can He now take them all – every one?  If we still cling to something we will not let go, we ask God to help us be willing.

Pg. 76 of The Big Book

discussion topics

  • The importance of doing the steps in order.
  • Two participants talked about not wanting to go but being so glad they did.
  • It’s easy to pass over the steps that don’t have an action.
    • That’s not how it works.
    • You have to choose that YOU don’t want to drink anymore.
    • You have to truly believe that a Power great than you can restore us to sanity.
    • You have to make a choice to turn your will and lives over to the care of God.
    • For 6 you have to be entirely ready to ask God to remove your defects of character.
  • The reoccurring theme to me was willingness.  This is where a lot of people made the choice that they were willing to do this.  Which of course is the spiritual principle of step 6.
    • Crazy that willingness comes halfway through the steps.
    • Fake it until you make it stops at step 6.

Hosanna!

3 Ways to get Stuck:

  1. Comfort Zone
    1. The end of your comfort zone is the beginning of living.
    2. The tendency to go back to our comfort zone.
  2. Emotional Health
    1. Fear, anxiety, pride…
    2. Trauma
    3. Greif
  3. Consumeristic Christianity
    1. When you consume something it’s gone!
    2. World of Look at Me!
    3. We are not meant to be consumers; we are meant to be contributors… 12th step.
    4. It’s not about you… it’s about others.

Getting unstuck

  1. Move into deeper waters – the 12 steps are all about moving into deeper waters.
    1. Take Jesus in the boat with you (higher Power)
    2. Stay humble (defects of character)
    3. Help others (step 12)

If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them wanders away, what will he do?  Won’t he leave the 99 others on the hills and go out to search for the 1 that is lost?  And if he finds it, I tell you the truth, he will rejoice over it more than over the 99 that didn’t wander away!  In the same way, it is not my heavenly Father’s will that even one of these little ones should perish.

Matthew 18: 12-14

I also wanted to make sure everyone understood this as well.  It doesn’t matter if you are an alcoholic listing to this podcast, if you 10, 20, 30 years sober.  If your still drinking and cannot stop.  If you the parent or wife or child of an alcoholic.  If you’re the friend of someone who maybe recently committed suicide.  If your someone watching a loved one spin out of control.  The answer is the same for everyone listing and everyone not.  Who is the 1 that is lost?  It’s not them.  It’s you!

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